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It has been said that mother's love is the purest form of love that exists, love that requires nothing more than being alive. Some people continue to seek this kind of love in other relationships even after they have grown up and become adults. A friend of mine said his mother once told him if he could find a woman who can tolerate his faults the way that she (his mother) can, he should marry her immediately. My friend is nearly 50 years old and not yet married.

Mother's love, by its very nature, is one-sided; one party gives while the other receives. In romantic and other forms of love, equality rules; both parties mutually share giving and receiving. Relationships other than those between mother and child, which are built on inequality, stand little chance of survival. Of course we all know of relationships of exploitation where both parties are dependent on each other; the "exploiter" needs someone to exploit and the "dependent" one needs to be exploited. Such relationships function as long as such mutual dependency continues to exist.

Companionship

In addition to the basic need for existence, humans have always exhibited the need for companionship. People need at least one person with whom to share intimacy and their most important values of life.

People also need to find things, we value, things which give us pleasure, which we can love, which give us a reason for living. We have seen that people who find themselves alone due to the loss of loved ones and simply choose to be alone may keep a pet or a plant in their home. Remember, a healthy plant will not only bring life into your space, but also absorb toxins in the air.

Need for appreciation

In the year 2001, a CNN opinion poll named U.S. President George Bush "the most loved man in America." Bush has gained the approval of the American people for his effort in the war against terrorism. American people have recognized Bush and shown appreciation for his personal dedication and sacrifice. But why does he do it? Why does a man who has obviously had many great successes in his life continue to strive for even higher levels of excellence?

Many will say such men are driven by the need for power. This may be true, but psychological studies have linked the need for power with the desire to be loved. Many winners of the Academy awards for Motion Pictures have said their struggles are fueled by their need to be loved and appreciated by their fans. It is a fact that people who have achieved great levels of success in their lives are usually admired, respected, and loved for their achievements.

Is love forever?

Debbie, 33, a credit collector for a shipping company, recently ended a three-year relationship. "From the moment I met Jerry, I knew he was right for me but experience taught me to proceed cautiously. After about four months of dating, I decided my first impressions were right; he was everything I always wanted in a man. We had three happy years together and Jerry repeatedly told me how contented he was to have found someone with whom he could share his life.

"We did everything together, took business courses, went on vacations, even saw the same movies. Living together was comfortable, but for some reason the thought of marriage never appealed to me. We had talked about having a family some day, but whenever Jerry brought up the subject, I felt I was not yet ready. Jerry wanted to take our relationship to the next level but I felt comfortable with the way things were. For the first time in our relationship, it dawned on me that my relationship with Jerry may not be forever. This frightened me because I truly loved him but I knew that I was not ready to get married to him.

"When I finally realized Jerry really wanted marriage, a strange thing happened. I began to feel uneasy with our relationship. Things were not like before; I lost some of my excitement and desire to be with him. It's as if I was inconsiderate to him after he had been so good to me. I felt like I did not deserve to be with him. We finally agreed to go our separate ways, and even though I miss him, I feel that somewhere along the way the love I had for him was lost.

"It's been four years since Jerry and I ended our relationship, and I am still trying to understand what happened between us. I've been seeing other guys, but so far I have not experienced the closeness I had with Jerry. My friends tell me I'm not yet ready to settle down with anyone, and maybe there're right. In my relationship with Jerry I felt free to be myself. We lived together like buddies without feeling tied down to each other, (at least that's the way I felt). When he became serious about marriage, I no longer saw him as a buddy, but as someone who was going to tie me down. I just got scared."

Do you believe this relationship was one of true love? Some may say it was a mistake because Debbie and Jerry were not truly compatible and should not have been together in the first place.

In my opinion, this relationship was successful because both participants enjoyed three fulfilling years of their lives together. Someone once said if you can have one moment of true happiness in your life, grab it because true happiness is not easy to find.

Love is a living entity; if it stands still, it could die. To be alive means to move forward and go where life's journey takes you. Love may die only to be reborn again in a different form. Perhaps both Jerry and Debbie will move on to find love in different places, but they will always cherish the love they once shared with each other.

Seven ways to tell if he/she truly loves you

A woman once asked, "Ok, I heard all the love stories of people being on cloud nine or feel surrounded by fresh roses that bloom only for them. But after all this, how do I know that he truly loves me? How could I be sure after being together for more than a year that his love is real?"